Wednesday, May 30, 2007

On the lighter side

What are four hundred rabbits hopping backwards?

A receding hare line.


Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprove the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Bobby, when I was a child, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Bobby looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."


My friend likes to read his two young sons fairy tales at night. Having a deep-rooted sense of humor, he often ad-libs parts of the stories for fun.
One day his youngest son was sitting in his first grade class as the teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs.

She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to acquire building materials for his home. She said, "...and so the pig went up to the man with a wheelbarrow full of straw and said 'Pardon me, sir, but might I have some of that straw to build my house with?'"

Then the teacher asked the class, "And what do you think that man said?" and my friend's son raised his hand and said, "I know! I know!

He said: 'Holy smokes! A talking pig!'"

The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.



My sister was at her wit's end trying to stop my four-year-old nephew, Todd, from sucking his thumb. Finally, she told him if he didn't stop, his stomach would get very big and puffy.
The following Sunday in church, there happened to be a very pregnant lady sitting in the same pew. Todd kept staring at her. When the service was over, he pulled at her arm and whispered,
"Your stomach is big and puffy... I know what you've been doing!"


Summer Reading

Strategic Defense in the Space Age
by Ray Gunn

Projectile Motion
by Fah Ling

The Complete Do-It-Yourself Guide to Amateur Astronomy
by I.C. Stars

The Physics of Rotation
by S. Pining

Science Education Today
by I. Noah Little

The Statistical Variations of Scantron Test Keys
by Noah Lot

by Kent Standm

The Past, Present and Future of the Stars in the Milky Way
by Horace Cope

How to Write Large Books
by Warren Peace

The Lion Attacked
by Claude Yarmoff

The Art of Archery
by Beau N. Arrow

Songs for Children
by Barbara Blacksheep

Irish Heart Surgery
by Angie O'Plasty

Desert Crossing
by I. Rhoda Camel

School Truancy
by Marcus Absent

I Was a Cloakroom Attendant
by Mahatma Coate

I Lost My Balance
by Eileen Dover and Phil Down

Mystery in the Barnyard
by Hu Flung Dung

Positive Reinforcement
by Wade Ago

by Danielle Soloud

The Philippine Post Office
by Imelda Letter

Things to Do at a Party
by Bob Frapples

Stop Arguing
by Xavier Breath

Raising Mosquitos
by I. Itch

Mountain Climbing
by Yugo First